My Blessingway

"A Blessingway is a wonderful ritual for the mother-to-be. It celebrates her step in motherhood (or motherhood again!) Baby showers are a lot of fun and they are a wonderful way to gift new parents things they need for the baby. A blessingway, however, is a unique way to honor the mother.

During the gathering, friends (and family) of the mother come together to give her support and encouragement as she waits for labor to begin. It is a wonderful and affirming time for her.

Oftentimes the friends at the ceremony agree that as soon as they receive word labor has begun they will say a prayer and light a candle for the mother. This support can mean so much to a laboring woman." info found here

My blessingway is at the end of September and I would be honored if anyone would like to participate, even long distance. Basically, we will be making a birthing necklace, lighting some candles and wearing a yarn/string bracelet until I give birth. You can participate or not in any of those things.

How the birthing necklace works is each mom picks a bead, something that is representative of something special to them. In the past, I've seen beads that are like big O's for the ooooooh noises of childbirth, or ones that look like placentas or ones that look like leaves on a tree for a recent documentary a mom saw on a tribe that all birthed in a hollowed out sacred tree. Spiral ones for spiraling hips or blue ones for the ocean or for having a boy. Ones that remind of peace or love or anything. It can be purple simply because it's your favorite color. Just anything that speaks to you. You can send that bead to me, with something that says why you chose it and then also a blessing. Some blessings I've heard is for a peaceful labor, a strong bond, a healing birth, a sensual birth, healthy baby, happy mommy, peaceful postpartum ETC. Then at the blessingway, we add your bead to the necklace and it's something I wear or have near while birthing.

The candles are for you to keep and light when I go into labor. You can light it and send me some happy vibes!

The yarn or string is something for you to wear on your wrist (as long as it doesn't get really annoying lol) and to remind you of me and to think of me and send me labor vibes throughout the day until I go into labor. This is something I've done for other blessingways, and it's really neat for about a week LOL

I would love for my birthing necklace beads to be a surprise, so if anyone would needs my address please call my mom, Jeremy's mom or email Jeremy.

Thank you to everyone who wants to be a part of it!

Gratitude

I'm grateful for:

1. The weather changing. The hotness and humidity have been draining and I welcome the smells of autumn, the colors and my ripening watermelons. It also means I'm much closer to meeting my new babe!

2. Exercising! We went to the state park and did a 3 mile hike and yesterday we hit the the trail and rode 6 miles on the bike! I feel so much more alive when I'm active and I appreciate how hard my body works for me and regain trust in my self and what my body is capable of performing. It's a really good feeling to see the look on my husbands face when I join him in riding, which is something he is passionate about. I'm grateful that he wants to share it with me, and that I got over my fear of riding and really enjoy it!

3. The little people I spend my day with. They really are amazing. Just to watch them grow, learn and love. They teach me so much.

4. My husband. I can't even say enough about this man. He's the most understanding and unconditionally loving person. I owe him so much and yet he never asks for anything. Just me being a part of his life is all he wants from me, and at times it's really all I have to give him. He's also taught me so much about love and friendship and patience and understanding.

5. My friends. It really means so much that you all take the time out of your days to listen to me gripe about mine. Just hearing that I'm not alone, the validation, the understanding from another woman, heals so much. I am grateful to be on my motherhood journey with all of you!

6. My baby. He reminds me everyday how precious life is. Whenever I'm feeling in a funk he kicks as if to say "hey ma, snap out of it!" and I know that every moment of this pregnancy has been worth it, that each difficulty I've encountered was for a purpose. In fact, I laughed at my vision board yesterday, because I had a bunch of stuff on there to have a healthy pregnancy and in the beginning I was eating terribly. The universe brought my sugar problems to the forefront because I asked for it, and I am grateful for that. It has been a struggle to learn different habits, but in the end, it is well worth the effort.

7. My family. It so awesome to know that I can call anytime and they will be there for me. I know if I ever needed them they'd be here in a heartbeat and they know I feel the same. It's been a journey into adulthood that hasn't always been easy and sometimes it's been downright awful. In the end, none of those times really amount to anything in comparison to the love, the fun and the joy I feel when I get to be around them. I only wish it could be more often.

8. Cucumbers. Yup. I pull like 6 huge ones from the garden daily. And I'm grateful because not only do I enjoy cucumbers, I'm going to use them to lure people in to visiting me :) So if anyone wants some yummy fresh from the garden cukes, I'm handing them out in payment for a few hours of chit-chat!

Only 50 days to go!!!!

Just went for the 33 week midwife appt yesterday. Everything is great! After my last post begging baby to flip, he decided to flip all the way into a breech position. That was even more uncomfortable! A few nights ago, he decided to get back into a better position and yesterday at our appointment he was in a really great place. He was fully awake and his heartbeat was 156-162. My blood sugars have been doing better, with a 30 day average of 115, and I've been cutting down on how often I test for my own sanity. Last week it was horribly humid and so I didn't get out to exercise as often as I'd like, but today seems to be the start of a beautiful week. It is currently 59 degrees out! Last night we went to a state park nearby and walked and let the kids play at the playgrounds and just talked. It seems we are both overwhelmed with all the upcoming events and also with everything going on lately. Only 4-9 more weeks!!! We can do it! Although I am REALLY hoping this one takes after his sister and is born early at 38wks rather than Jonas who didn't appear until 41.5 weeks LOL

Our next appt is in 3 weeks, it's the home visit when the MW's will be coming over and having dinner with us. At that time, they will be bringing the birth supplies and birth tub. It really seems like it's getting so close now! I'm very excited and can't wait to meet our little one and not be pregnant anymore but I'm also nervous about how everything is going to go!

Dear Baby

I realize that our time as one is drawing to an end and your days of carefree floating are soon to be disrupted by hunger, bright lights and loud siblings. I do hope your last weeks are comfy and cozy but I ask you, no beg you, please....stop with the midnight rib kicking. I know you still have time left to turn into proper positioning, but frankly, I'm not digging the current LOP (left occiput posterior) spot you've claimed this last week. It causes me to have constant heartburn, sharp shooting pains in my cervix, charlie horse-like ligament pains, painful braxton hicks contractions that are centered in my lower back and worse, flashbacks of your older sisters posterior birth. Sure, you get to punch me in the bladder when in that position and your siblings can't gouge you while jumping all over me...but PLEASE...turn around.

Warmly,
Your Mommy

30.5weeks along now!

I love the "Mom you so crazy!!!" Look on Madelyn's face


"Put your shirt down!" the neighbors can see!

Breakfast

This morning for breaky I'm having some self-made Almond Butter & Blueberry Oat Bran with a splash of Lactose-free milk which was inspired after reading this article about taste-testing milk and milk alternatives. Regular milk is full of lactose sugar which sends my blood glucose thru the roof. 30g Carbs, 18g Protein for the eats and they are pretty tasty. Even Jonas is trying to get some of the action.

I've been doing pretty well with my new eat habits. Yesterday was my worst day, I had 2 bites of the ultra moist chocolate cupcakes and a few licks of the frosting fingers I had while making it. Hey, it's hard to not lick frosting off your fingers and I would do it automatically before thinking about it! Check out Jonas' blog later this week for cupcake pictures and party pics! Of course after the lunch-time cupcake celebration, we decided to go to the State Fair. Considering the usual fair fodder, I didn't do *too* bad, I ate a sirloin steak sandwich sans bun, only had a few sips of a lemonade shake-up and did ask if they could cut most of the sugar out (which they said NO) so I just drank less of it than I would normally. Then I had a "Philly" Cheese Steak Sandwich, which I was sure they should have quoted the "cheese" part because at first I thought it was mayo. I did eat the bun on that one, and my blood sugar let me know by the mood swings, headaches and 46pts hike above my "never go above this line" measures when I got home. The kids had a great time tho...I will update our fair trip later this week too, when I get time to go thru the pictures.

What I'm reading these days...

"The American Way of Birth" by Jessica Mitford. It covers such fascinating topics like doctors who have 75% cesarean section rates over the winter holidays, rich people having more cesareans than the poor health deprived population, the invention and demise of forceps, the tortures inflicted upon women since the medieval times, sutures with no anesthesia performed 30 times on a single slave woman and others and the various kinds of drugs used to lesson the curse of Eve. All that, and I'm only halfway through!

This book has brought out feelings of sadness, horror, disgust, interest and outrage! I cannot believe that the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology have known since the 1990's that electronic fetal monitoring "do not offer outcome advantages over auscultation via stethoscope" due to studies done at that time and in fact "a significant increase in the rate of operative deliveries, both vaginal and abdominal, was reported in women who recieved continuous electronic fetal monitoring....Cesarean delivery rate was also significantly increased." And yet in 2004 I was continuously monitored during Madelyns birth. FORCED to lie on my back during a horrendous posterior birth for fear of losing the heartbeat print-out, causing me to beg for drugs that had me forget almost all of Madelyns first moments, caused Madelyn to need suctioning, and required an episiotomy that pained me for months....FOR NO REASON...

Definitely trying out this recipe!

Why? Because I am sick of eggs for breakfast. Scrambled, fried, boiled. BLECH. So so tired of eggs. Plus, it looks absolutely scrumptious!

I yanked it from Blaine's Low Carb Kitchen off of Fit TV

Low-Carb Pancakes with Blackberry Syrup and sausage

Pancakes:
1 cup soy flour
1/4 cup wheat flour
4 tsp baking powder
2 tbsp. low carb sweetener (i'll be using stevia)
1/4 teaspoon salt
3 eggs
1 1/2 cup half and half
3 tablespoons canola oil
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Syrup:
1 cup blackberries
1 - 2 tsp. butter
1/4 cup low carb syrup (i may omit the syrup)



Pancake Preparation:(approximately 2.5 net carbs per pancake)
Beat oil, eggs, vanilla extract and half and half in a large bowl with a wire whip. Sift in dry ingredients and beat batter until smooth. Don't worry about over-mixing. Preheat large frying pan over medium-medium high heat. Spray pan liberally with canola cooking spray. Spoon a generous tablespoon of batter into pan making sure pancakes don't touch. Flip pancake when bubbles start to form on top. Cook about 2 minutes each side.

Syrup Preparation:
Heat blackberries and butter over low heat. Mash berries with back of spoon. Add low-carb syrup and warm. Serve over pancakes or low carb French toast.

Yields 6 servings (3 pancakes each) with syrup and two links of sausage - approximately 9.5 net carbs per serving

Frustrating!!!

Partially the new diet has worked wonders for many things: noticeable difference in my moods and energy levels and also the puffiness, that I hadn't even noticed until is was gone, in my face, wrists and ankles has vanished!
This was taken about a week before I started the diet (by Madelyn...she's such a good photographer!)


And this was taken about a week after starting


The difference is very noticeable!

This diet is still very much a work in progress as proven by my recent spilling of ketones into my urine. This happens when the body isn't getting enough carbs/sugar or calories and so it will burn up fat to access the sugar needed for the baby to grow. Normally, this isn't a horrible thing, if you are dieting and it's what Atkins Dieters strive for. During pregnancy, this is NOT a good thing, it causes your body to think it's in starvation mode and the ketones circulating in your blood cause acidosis that can harm the babe, if it stays at high levels for a long period of time. So I am trying to find a good balance of not eating too much sugars but making sure that I do eat enough. It's also interesting to note that since cutting out the processed junk, I'm now not getting enough salt in my diet! Salt is important, especially right now as my blood volume has just doubled and I never realized how much sodium I got in from junk food. I've been having to add salt where I can to help keep the ankle swelling to a minimum and keep my blood pressure up where it should be. I guess cutting out the 1660mg of sodium I ate from having 2 McChicken sandwiches really changes things!

This morning I am having turkey sausage links and Steel Cut Oatmeal with cinnamon (a proven spice that helps with blood sugars! who knew?!?!?!?) and stevia. If you haven't tried stevia I HIGHLY recommend it! It comes in different flavors and is very sweet. The best part is that it doesn't effect your blood sugars, has 0 calories, and since it's a plant it's all natural. They sell it at health food stores and I've even found it at Meijer, although it's in the supplements aisle because the FDA forbids it to be labeled as "food" so it's a "dietary supplement". I have vanilla flavor in my oatmeal and grape flavor in my water right now. I have a feeling that if I got some bubbly water and added grape (or any other flavor...i've seen root beer flavor too!) that it would be better than grape soda.

So we are chugging along. 10-ish more weeks of this ultra strict diet, after which I will still want and need to modify my eating habits, just not as drastically. Jeremy is being very supportive, and even feels guilty for buying himself Mt. Dew at work or McDonalds for lunch. I didn't expect him to start eating like me, afterall he's his own person and has normal blood sugar, but he's started to adopt a lot of my (hopefully soon to be) habits and lost a few pounds in the process! He's also helped to take away some of the stress of meals by making dinners and helping me to plan my meals. I can't say that I'm not totally bummed about not partaking in cake eating celebrations next week for Jonas' birthday, but I'm hoping that watching him devour it will be a good enough time to make up for it!

Pregnancy update

For the past 10 days (and counting!!!) I've been making some major dietary changes. At the last appointment with my midwives we discussed how tired I've been, my current weight gain and ways to improve my diet. What I eat is already pretty healthy and upon examining my food journal, we couldn't figure out why I feel the way I do. They suggested I get my blood sugar checked, based on my previous PCOS condition and the insulin resistance that came with it. The tests showed what we were worried about, my body is very close to diabetic levels and that explains so much of the symptoms I've been struggling with this pregnancy. I've been testing my blood sugars regularly and I'm very pleased to say that my averages are doing very very well now! I really miss eating the occasional ice cream or cookie and especially miss pasta, potatoes, breads, milk and fruit. I *can* have any of those things, very sparingly and linked with a protein. So far I've only tested bread and a little milk on some All Bran Extra Fiber cereal that tasted like cat food. It's been a very hard transition, one that was a long time in the making since I've needed to do this 5 years ago when I was diagnosed but never made the step out of denial and self-pity to do it. I still whine a little when Jeremy gets to drink juice or they are having pasta and I'm eating my umpteenth salad, but I've got so much more energy and am overall feeling great for being 30 weeks pregnant. I think the biggest motivator for me is that I do NOT want to be an insulin dependent diabetic, especially not during pregnancy because that warrants a complete system managed hospital birth, including induction at 38 weeks. A pleasant bonus is that I've actually lost 3 pounds, which isn't a big deal since I've got extra padding and have already gained quite a bit.

It's hard to not focus on the things I cannot eat, especially if we stop to get fast food or go to a restaurant, but I am enjoying trying new foods that I probably never would've given a second glance otherwise. Here is a picture of the delicious dinner I made tonight! In olive oil I let some garlic and onion sweat, browned the chicken breasts, deglazed the pan with red wine vinegar, added a can of stewed and diced tomatoes and mushrooms, cooked the juices out, added chicken back, topped with mozzarella and parmesan and broiled in the oven until the mozzarella was brown and bubbly. The salad was a mix of romaine, mustard greens and boston butter lettuce (TRY THIS...the texture and taste are remarkable!) with cucumbers from our garden, tomatoes, bacon bits, pine nuts and caesar dressing.

The Essence of the Placenta

Okay so I've been debating...lotus birth vs. placentaphagia. Raw or dried? Obviously, to quote a fellow MDC mom, "I'd eat rancid chicken poop if that meant I didn't have to suffer PPD again", but it's more than that.

Admittedly, the thought of leaving rotting meat on my new baby until it detaches itself is not in line with the rosy cheeks and sleepy smiles I envision the first few days with babe to consist of. And so Lotus birth, until now, has always been thought of as a spiritual practice in my mind. The placenta with its nurturing essence left unfettered to the newest spirit to arrive in this world. It is only when the need for this attachment slowly fades away that this fleshy life-giver releases itself. It shows the very heart of patience, caring for both your baby and placenta, staying submerged in your babymoon until such time that the child decides the need for connection is gone. A symbiotic parallel to the very core of childhood, showing the inherent dependency and child-led gradual loving release that occurs in all of the basic fundamentals of life with child. It is the true embodiment of pregnancy, birth and mothering. Spiritual, yes, and yet it is MORE.

Lotus birth babies are "demonstrably more relaxed and peaceful babies who do not manifest the common (and stressful to baby and mother) 1 lb. newborn weight loss and breastfeeding jaundice that is associated with the first week of life after "normal" birth's cord cutting, particularly cord cutting within an hour of birth. These intact Lotus babies lose no energy just trying to stabilize their systems in the early postpartum hours and this shows on all levels (relaxation, bountiful healthy weight gain, core muscle strength, fine & gross motor skills, and alert observation of the world around them). (more information available HERE including ways to salt and scent the drying placenta) In addition to this, Lotus babies are said not to get jaundice and the cord, having not been severed and displaying an open wound, heals within about 3 days.

The most remarkable beauty of a lotus birth is to see the baby grasping its cord, mirroring the utero pastime, while nursing contentedly. Mothers have reported their babies never crying in those quiet post birth days until a few moments before the cord releases. Other mom's have enjoyed witnessing such feats of understanding such as the placenta pulsing while nursing and the baby waking when the placenta is lightly touched.

Chimpanzees practice Lotus Birth, however it is well known that mammals, including vegetarian, will ingest the placenta after birth. Placentaphagia, or eating the placenta, shares its essence with the birthing mother; a ritual thought to keep predators away. If this were indeed the only reason, then each mother would also ingest all of her leaking amniotic fluids because this is also very heavily scented. The placenta has many nutritional, as well as, emotional benefits. It restores hormones, specifically oxytocin: the same hormone the surges during passionate lovemaking, birth and breastfeeding. It replenishes lost iron, and can greatly aid in postpartum depression, mood swings, insomnia and give energy. This practice is well documented in Chinese medicine and is unfortunately another misguided facet of western society.

Eating the placenta raw, like many of the most nutrient-rich foods, gives the consumer the most benefits, and I've even read research that this includes stopping postpartum hemorrhage. A wonderful smoothie recipe a friend bestowed upon me is: frozen bananas, blueberries, strawberries, 2 walnut sized flesh fruit (your amazing placenta), apple juice and red raspberry leaf tea, blended. You can also make up extra packets to enjoy this drink for days after your birth. It is said to be better than “Jamba Juice”. Other preparations include dehydrating, grinding and encapsulating the placenta which still gives you wonderful benefits, based on the testimony of many mothers. And yet still others prefer to take tiny pieces raw and swallow them whole.

Isn't it amazing what the placenta is able to do, especially when our culture regards this giver of life as medical waste? It has grown and nurtured a life and we just toss it away like so much of the trash in our consumer driven lives. There are many ways to receive the essence of the placenta, but who should it go to...the baby or the mother? Lotus birth or Placentaphagia? Either way, the Essence of the Placenta is worth pondering.